The KISS Method

The salesperson will behave as if they are too stupid to answer some of the customer’s questions.....

Car dealers may use many types of sales strategies to control their customers.  However, the most common is known as the KISS Method.  "K.I.S.S" is an acronym for "Keep-It-Simple-Stupid".   When the salesman employs this method they will behave as if they are too stupid to answer the customer’s questions.  In other words, by acting stupid they won't answer any questions that they don't wish to answer.   This allows them to move though a predefined “step by step” sales process without getting sidetracked.

In most cases, dealerships will instruct their salespeople to follow a strict sales process.   They are taught this process in order to convert customers into “same-day” sales.   Admittedly, no one wants to act incompetent.  However, because many dealerships will instruct their salesmen to follow certain steps, they must stay on track by sheepishly admitting they can't immediately answer some of the customer's questions.

The dealer uses "KISS" to better manage its sales force. Look at it this way; it is easier to teach a salesman to perform the “seven steps to a sale”, than to tell them to “go sell a car.”  You can read about the "car salesman's sevens steps" in Chapter One: Preparation of this guide. It is worth mentioning that most dealerships require their salesman to perform these steps and will threaten to fire them if they don’t.

These steps are to be performed in a specific order; one step must be completed before the next step is attempted.

For example, the salesman may be at a step in the sales process that would require the customer to test-drive the car and the salesman has been instructed that they are not allowed to discuss the price until this "test-drive" step is completed. 

Unfortunately, the customer asks “What’s the monthly payment on this car?”

Now the salesperson has to make an adjustment.  Using the "KISS" method, the salesman would respond by acting stupid by saying “I can’t calculate monthly payments in my head.   If I could…I probably would be the manager...First, let’s take the car for a test drive and I will get that information for you when we get back". 

In the above scenario, the salesman has avoided answering the customer's question by acting like a simpleton and has successfully kept the customer moving to the next step.  Eventually, they would like to talk about the price, but they want negotiations to occur in a controlled environment after they have performed all of the preliminary steps. 

The "Colombo Act' is a popular variation of the "KISS" method and is often used during price negotiations.  This is when the salesmen will model themselves after the bumbling television character "Colombo".  In other words, they will act incompetent while actually controlling the pace and direction of the conversation.  

After the customer has submitted their offer, the salesman will briefly leave the room and then return immediately scratching their head with a confused look on their face.  They then say to the customer, “Let me get this straight, you would like to keep your payments at only two hundred fifty dollars…but with only two thousand dollars down? Is that right?”  By acting confused the salesman attempts to get the customer to doubt the chances that their offer will be accepted. This, of course, makes it easier for the salesman to get a "Bump" later during the negotiations.

Green-Pea

 

Another common variation of "KISS" is when the salesperson explains that they are "new" to the business and are still learning the ropes.  Many ten year veterans will tell their customers they are "brand new" salesmen.  If the salesman acts like a “green-pea”, their novice abilities will entitle them to be uninformed and not required them to answer any tough questions. 

 

There are many advantages for a salesman to act as though they are a "green-pea".  For instance, when a salesman is "new", customers tend to be empathetic and may feel compelled to help the salesman succeed. During the negotiation, the customer will witness the "brand new" salesperson battling the sales manager trying very hard to get a good deal.  Many times, this may motivate the customer to increase their offer.  In other words, they want to help the "new" salesman get their first deal!

 

Another “green pea” strategy is to obligate the customer.   This goes hand-in-hand with the "KISS" method.  For example, the salesperson will be running back and forth and doing "whatever it takes to make a deal".   Because the salesperson is theoretically "new", they will appear to have to work much harder to accomplish these challenges.  Again, the customer then may feel obligated to the salesman because of the time and effort they have spent.

 

Keep in mind, most dealerships would prefer to have their salespeople act “brand new” and perform limited roles.  Historically, it can be a disadvantage to have salespeople that can readily answer all of  the customer’s questions.  Dealers know from experience that if a customer can get all of their questions answered quickly, chances are they will go home to think about their purchase.  The salesperson stands the best chance of selling the car on the first visit.  This requires the salesman to have control of their customers and sometimes acting simple and stupid is the best technique.